I am just trying to be good...( a diary)

As I walked down the busy sidewalk, knowing I was late for an important meeting, my eye fell upon one of those unfortunate, homeless vagabonds that are found in every city these days.
Wearing what can only be described as rags, carrying every worldly possession in two plastic bags, my heart was touched by this person's condition.
Some people turned to stare. Others quickly looked away as if the sight would somehow
contaminate them.
Recalling some long ago Parochial School admonition to "care for the sick, feed the hungry and clothe the naked," I was moved by some powerful inner urge to reach out to this unfortunate person.
Yes, where some people saw only rags, I saw a hidden beauty. A small voice inside my head called out, "Reach out, reach out!"






So I did..........




I Won't be in Church this weekend


TED

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WHY PARENTS DRINK!



A boss wondered why one of his most valued employees had not

arrived at work or rung in sick.

Having an urgent problem with one of the main computers, he rang his

home phone number and was greeted with a child's whisper.



'Is your daddy home?' he said

'Yes' whispered the small voice



'May I talk with him?'



The child whispered ' No.'





Surprised and wanting to talk to an adult, the boss asked

'Is Mummy there?' ... 'Yes'



'May I talk with her?'



Again the small voice whispered, 'No.'

Hoping there was somebody with whom he could leave a message,

asked 'Is anybody else there?'



'Yes,' whispered the child 'a policeman'.



Wondering what a cop would be doing at his employee's residence,

'May I speak with the policeman?'



'No, he's busy' whispered the child.



'Busy doing what?'



'Talking to Daddy and Mummy and the Fireman' came the whisper.



Growing more worried as he heard a loud noise in the earpiece on the phone, the boss asked

'What is that noise?'

'A helicopter' answered the whispering voice.



'What is going on there?' demanded the boss, now truly worried.

Again, whispering, the child answered 'The search team just arrived.'



Alarmed, concerned and a little frustrated, the boss asked 'What are they searching for?'



Still whispering, the young voice replied with a muffled response

'me'.

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Secretary's Resimay (Resume)

SECRETARY 'S RESUME

Deer Sir,

I waunt to apply for the secritary job what I saw in the paper. I can
Type real quik wit one finggar and do sum a counting.

I think I am good on the phone and no I am a pepole person, Pepole
really seam to respond to me belly well.

I´m lookin for a Jobb as a secritary but it musent be to complicaited.

I no my spelling is not to good but find that I Offen can get a job thru
my persinalety. My salerery is open so we can discus wat you want to
pay me and wat you think that I am werth,

I can start imeditely. Thank you in advanse fore yore anser. .

hopifuly Yore best aplicant so farr.


Sinseerly,

Peggy May Starlings


PS : Because my resimay is a bit short - below is a pickture of me
taken at my last jobb.





Employer's reply:......


Dear Peggy,

It's OK honey, we've got spell check.....
Welcome onboard!!